The Horrors of Minot’s Underbelly (in honor of Francis Ford Coppola’s Birthday)
The streets of Minot are alive with a sickening cacophony today, my friends. The taps are pouring, the bottles are popping, and the denizens of this cursed town are embracing their depraved indulgences with reckless abandon.
At the Atypical Brewery & Barrelworks, the wretched masses gather to partake in “Sweetly Sour Sundays,” a perverse ritual where they drown their sorrows in $1 off every sour abomination, be it tap, can, or bottle. The acrid stench of their misery hangs thick in the air, a palpable testament to the depths of human depravity.
And what of the poor fools who stumble to Arny’s 2.0, seeking solace in the false comfort of “brunch and mimosas”? They are mere pawns in the grand theater of suffering, their souls rotting away with each sip of that bubbly poison.
The madness knows no bounds, for even the fireworks associationhas been roped into this carnival of despair, hawking hot dogs to fund their twisted pyrotechnic displays. And the hapless citizens, blind to the horrors that await them, flock to these spectacles like moths to a flame.
Minot, my friends, is a cesspool of iniquity, a place where the very fabric of humanity has been rent asunder. And I, a mere observer of this unfolding tragedy, can only watch in silent horror as the townspeople descend further into the abyss.
Got a guess at today’s celebrity writer? It’s Colonel Walter E. Kurtz from the 1979 film Apocalypse Now
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Upcoming Fun!
Check out these happenings on the horizon:
- Record Store Day 2024 @BudgetMusic | Saturday, April 20th
- Badlands Earth Day Hike! @BadlandsConservation | Saturday, April 27th
- iMagicon 2024 @Imagicon | Friday, April 26th
Today’s Happenings!
Today’s Features
Sweetly Sour Sundays! @Atypical
Sunday, April 7th
Pucker up for Sweetly Sour Sundays at Atypical Brewery & Barrelworks this April 7th in Downtown Minot! Enjoy $1 off every sour – tap, cans, bottles – and let the good times roll. #CraftBeerLovers #DowntownMinot #SavorMinot
Taste & Experience
Brunch & Bubbles @1685
Sunday, April 7th
Kickstart your Sunday with an indulgent Brunch & Bubbles at 1685, nestled in the scenic Minot Country Club. Savor bottomless mimosas and delectable cuisine every Sunday, where the view complements the vibe. #BrunchLove #BottomlessMimosas #SavorMinot
Special Events & Fundraisers
Hot Dogs for a Cause! @MinotFireworks
Saturday, April 6th — Sunday, April 7th
Join us at the Main Marketplace this weekend, April 6th-7th, for “Hot Dogs for a Cause!” and enjoy a tasty treat while supporting the Minot Fireworks Association’s efforts for a spectacular July 4th display. Delicious $2 hotdogs and $1 pop await, with all proceeds going towards our free community fireworks show. #SupportLocal #CommunitySpirit #SavorMinot
Weekly Features
The Spicy Stro (Weekend Pizza Feature) @PrairieSkyBreads
Saturday, April 6th — Sunday, April 7th
This weekend, let your taste buds dance with The Spicy Stro, our special pizza feature at Prairie Sky Breads in Downtown Minot! Dive into a delicious blend of pepperoni, Italian sausage, and a trio of peppers atop our signature crust, available April 6th and 7th. #PizzaLovers #WeekendEats #SavorMinot
Weekly Features
Weekly Features @PrairieSkyBreads
Wednesday, April 3rd — Sunday, April 7th
Dive into the flavors of downtown Minot this week at Prairie Sky Breads! From our Chicken Artichoke special to our signature salads and toasts, there’s something to delight everyone. #DowntownDelights #PrairieSkyBreads #SavorMinot
Weekly Features
This Week’s Soups @SchatzCrossroads
Monday, April 1st — Sunday, April 7th
Warm up your week with a different hearty soup every day at Schatz Crossroads in South Minot, from April 1st to April 7th! Dive into deliciousness and make your way to the truck stop for a taste that’s sure to delight. 🍲 #HeartySoups #WarmUpWithUs #SavorMinot
Taste & Experience
Brunch! @Arny’s
Saturday, April 6th — Sunday, April 7th
Wake up to the taste of downtown Minot this weekend at Arny’s 2.0, where brunch and mimosas await your pleasure! Whether it’s morning or afternoon for you, let’s make Saturday & Sunday at Arny’s a memorable experience. #BrunchTime #MimosaReady #SavorMinot
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